How much does it take for us to be loved, for us to be saved?

Pretty sure you hit a new low when you sniff Sharpie's for the high.

I wish I understood myself.  I need to stop caring about what other people think about me or want me to do.  If I could do anything, what would I do? Sleep. Not participate in life.

So... hi. You know who you are, stalking me so diligently.  I'm trying to figure out my life. Trying new things. Letting go of other things.

I've learned not to judge a book by it's cover.  No one is perfect, and people usually have a reason behind what they do.  So before you think you know what's best for someone in their situation, stop and remember that you have your own problems to deal with.

I'm tired. Night.

Howdy?

So turns out, my life is actually too interesting to blog about.


A million things have changed in just one year. I can't wrap my head around it. I can't write about it. I should go to counselling, but something is stopping me.  Maybe it's because I believe if I don't admit that something happened... it'll go away? The memory will fade and I can go on like it didn't happen. As if the psychological aspect of it wasn't enough, I now have physical reminder.

I can't concentrate.  I'm not motivated.  I'm just numb.

I feel beyond worthless.

But it's not my fault, right?
Just keep telling me that.
I swear to God, I may never believe you.

Because I know,
Deep down,
You think I'm an idiot,
You blame me just as much as I blame myself.

So I'm gonna pretend everything is fine. Time heals all, so I've heard.